Pat Robertson; Comic genius, or mindless git?

Someone linked me to a website today. All the following quotations, denoted by "" are from a charming gentleman, Pat Robertson. I couldn't help but poke some obvious holes. and I felt like ranting.

"The Islamic people, the Arabs, were the ones who captured Africans, put them in slavery, and sent them to America as slaves. Why would the people in America want to embrace the religion of slavers."

Erm. See here, genius, you used them as slaves too. Take a look back a few hundred years in your own countries history, and you'll see what I mean. So.. Hate to break it, but your country is a slaver too.

"Just like what Nazi Germany did to the Jews, so liberal America is now doing to the evangelical Christians. It's no different...More terrible than anything suffered by any minority in history."

They're gassing Evangelical Christians, murdering them, doing sickening experiments on them, generally treating them like the scum on shit on the bottom of a boot?

Didn't think so. sorry, buster, you're going to have to try harder.

"When lawlessness is abroad in the land, the same thing will happen here that happened in Nazi Germany. Many of those people involved with Adolph Hitler were Satanists, many of them were homosexuals – the two things seem to go together."

For starters, it's Adolf. Second off, when did you invent the time machine? Seriously, did you ask them or did you just play too much Return To Castle Wolfenstein? As for them being homosexual.. Erm.. I guess this might have escaped your notice, but they kinda tried to make a master race, I wasn't aware men could give birth. Try again.

"The feminist agenda is not about equal rights for women. It is about a socialist, anti-family political movement that encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism, and become lesbians."

Oh? Funny, that, I was under the impression that only radical feminist groups were even slightly inclined towards lesbianism. I suppose I must be missing all these witchcraft related, child killing, capitalism destroying lesbian femminist movements these days.. Do they only happen somewhere where there's no news coverage, like in the middle of Ethiopia?

"You say you're supposed to be nice to the Episcopalians and the Presbyterians and the Methodists and this, that, and the other thing. Nonsense, I don't have to be nice to the spirit of the Antichrist."

Wait.. What? Who's the anti-christ? I guess I missed that one. Try harder. Or at least back your thoughts up with something other than a book that was supposedly written a few thousand years ago.

"I know this is painful for the ladies to hear, but if you get married, you have accepted the headship of a man, your husband. Christ is the head of the household and the husband is the head of the wife, and that's the way it is, period."

I wasn't aware that Christ had a family of his own. Of course, parents, but I was under the impression that he died before he could father any children. I guess someone had some artificial insemination clinic running back then.

"[Homosexuals] want to come into churches and disrupt church services and throw blood all around and try to give people AIDS and spit in the face of ministers."

Of all the homosexuals I know, I don't know one that A: has AIDS, b: wants to bleed on Church goers, c: wants to spit on ministers. I guess all those nutters weren't found by the news coverage team either.

"[Planned Parenthood] is teaching kids to fornicate, teaching people to have adultery, every kind of bestiality, homosexuality, lesbianism – everything that the Bible condemns."

Oh.. So.. You're advocating some people meeting up, and just having children, then having the wonderous custody case?

Sorry, but that statement is so bloody mindless I can't even become to formulate a response that dosn't involve laughter, the words 'fuck' 'you' and 'dumbshit'.

I'll give it some more thought when I stop crying with laughter.